Center for Workplace Happiness

Think of the most positive person you know. They may be so positive that sometimes they annoy you with their sunny outlook. Now, take this in – that person has negative thoughts, just like you.

Neuroscience research has documented the brain’s negativity bias – it’s a survival trait that we don’t really need anymore but it still persists. Even the most positive people have negative thoughts. They just don’t let their negative thoughts control their day, and you can make the same choice.

It sounds easy and often it’s not easy. It can be done – when you find yourself feeling helpless, hopeless or headed for a downward spiral of horribilizations, use a mental stop sign and distract yourself. Think about something else, laugh at yourself for thinking old, not-helpful thoughts, and if all else fails, sing a song out loud. You can't think negative thoughts when you're singing.

It’s harder at first, and the more you catch yourself and...

You know how someone gives you the willies?
You know that one thing that when you eat it, you don’t feel good the next day?
You know there’s that one street you avoid driving down and you don’t know why?

Trust those feelings.

Gut reactions – knee-jerk responses – intuition – no matter what you call feelings like that, trust them. Your skin is the largest organ on your body - do you think maybe it's picking up up "bad vibes?" Research is ongoing and also pointing in that direction. Your gut has the same receptor cells as your brain, and they're tuned into emotions and emotional reactions - do you think your enteric brain might be trying to tell you something? Research is answering that question with a resounding "yes."

Your brain and body are picking up on something that you may not understand, and it’s ok that you don’t understand it. Trust it. You know what you know…trust what you know, whether you can explain what you know or...

What do you love to do outside of your career?

Another way to ask that question – what is your hobby? Hiking with your dog? Golf? Travel? Whatever feeds your soul, do it. When looking at your weekly calendar you should see your hobby reflected there somehow. Block out time for your hobby and don’t let work or other obligations continually crowd out your hobby.

Mental wellbeing is necessary in order for you to give your best to your patients, clients and co-workers and your hobby gives you a much-needed outlet for built-up stress. When you continually back-burner the things that feed your soul, soon you won't have anything to give to your patients, clients and co-workers...and for that matter, your family members or yourself.

Your hobby is the antidote to stress and burnout. Dose yourself regularly.

Want more? Click here for a free audio course, "Happiness is an Inside Job"

#vetlife #veterinarian #vethospital #vettech #notonemorevet #wellbeing #success...

No matter how many different ways you hear that forgiveness is good for you, you might still think that there are some people who don’t deserve your forgiveness. That's a normal, human feeling. Can I help you change your mind about that?

The concept of good and evil is drilled into us in so many ways from before we take our first tottering steps. The adults around us model unforgiveness and holding grudges and use language that subtly – or sometimes not so subtly – lets us know that there are dire consequences for misbehaving. We see others not forgiving and talking about not forgiving and so we think it must be ok or good or even admirable to never forgive certain people for certain things.

A healthier way to look at so-called unforgivable behavior is this – when you forgive someone for something they did, you put them on notice that they’re not in charge of your emotions. They don’t control you because of what they did to you.

You control you.

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Is there someone in your life who goes off unpredictably, sometimes spewing anger and resentment at you?

Yeah, that happens to us all at some point in our lives. Sometimes it’s a person you can avoid being around, and sometimes it’s a co-worker or family member.

Yikes…what then? That’s when I want you to don your placid cow persona.

There’s someone I have to be around fairly often who is very insecure, and that insecurity manifests as aggressive defensiveness. No amount of soothing will derail this person when that behavior starts – those of us in the vicinity just have to wait it out and hope the verbal barrage isn’t pointed at us.

When something like this happens to you, maybe what I do can help you, too. Make it a game – imagine that you’re a beautiful cow, standing in a lush green pasture, chewing your cud under a sunny, cloudless sky. Your mouth is closed, your eyes are soft and you are 100% focused on your little...

High achievers often struggle with overwhelm and imposter syndrome. Let me say that again and say it better this time – high achievers like you often struggle with overwhelm and imposter syndrome.

You’ve been driving yourself since you were a child – to get high grades, to take tough classes, to push through until you achieved your goal and then to feel like that goal wasn’t good enough, so you set an even tougher one.

Sound familiar? It does to me, too – that’s how I was and still work to not be.

Finding balance in life isn’t only about a work-life balance, it’s about a more balanced view of who you are and what you need.

You need to rest.
You need to take time off.
You need to do what feeds your soul.

You need to remember that your needs are your first priority. When you do that, you’re less likely to be sick, to be burned out, or to go down dark mental pathways.

Take your foot off the gas – give yourself 15 minutes a day...

Do you know someone who is very judgmental?

Maybe they voice unflattering opinions about women who carry expensive handbags or people who drive a large vehicle or the neighbors who have a car that doesn’t move very often? They have an opinion about everyone and it’s most often not a very nice one?

When someone behaves like that, it’s about them, not about the person they’re judging. It gives you a glimpse into their early life and what they were taught, either intentionally or unintentionally. It’s likely they don’t even know they’re making snap judgments about people – it’s become their default behavior.

If it’s someone you deal with on a daily basis, like a team member or family member, you can help them see themselves as others do, and help them make a change for the better. When they say something like, “Her purse probably cost as much as my house payment…she thinks she’s so special!” you can...

Have you ever felt completely and totally misunderstood? Isn’t that the worst feeling? And it doesn’t matter how much you try to explain yourself, the other person is adamant that their interpretation of you and your motives is right and that you’re not a very nice person.

Ouch!

Please listen to this…think about this…analyze this…and then internalize this: what other people think of you is none of your business.

When they draw an incorrect conclusion about you, nothing you can say will sway them because they’re hearing your words through the same distortions that created their misunderstanding of you in the first place.

How they feel about you is NOT your responsibility.

They’ll either see the truth as they continue to interface with you and re-evaluate their knee-jerk response or they’ll continue to be clueless about the wonderful person you are. You just go on being that wonderful person. It’s not your job to fix...

Maybe you've had someone go off for no apparent reason on you, too?

The other day I was driving on the interstate. A motorcyclist went by, going about 90 miles an hour. About 10 minutes later, the motorcyclist was in the lane in front of me, stuck in stand-still traffic.

It was a hot, sunny southern day, the motorcyclist was in full leather gear and sitting on a hot engine, going nowhere and without the air conditioning the rest of us were enjoying. As we rolled forward about 5 feet at a time, suddenly this person started waving their arms, flipping me off and yelling. My guess is that they thought I was too close but what I know for sure is that their behavior was about them, not about be. Hot and frustrated at not being able to fly down the road, it was easy to take their frustration out on me. I gave an exaggerated shrug, hoping to signal that I didn’t mean to do whatever they thought I did but it didn’t stop the bad behavior. Taking a video of them behaving like a...

Are you feeling a little bit stuck in your life? Like you’re OK with where you are but you thought you’d be farther along by now?

Where do you want to be? What do you want to have?

When we were in school, our paths were mapped out for us – progression through classes and grades to earn graduation, so we could progress through more classes and years to graduation again. After school years, it’s easy to forget to create our own framework so we can chart the course to our next “graduation” – whatever that may be, and it’s different for everyone.

Go back and answer those two questions - where do you want to be and what do you want to have. Spend some time on that, just as you did when you chose your preferred school and your profession.

Think about your next “graduation” – what will it look like? What will you have to learn and do in order to “graduate” this time? Now, take a few minutes today to lay out the...