Wagaliciousness Begins Here!

‘Tis the season that those of us in the northern hemisphere bundle up. And those of us with dogs, especially the small and relatively hairless ones, bundle their dogs up, too. If that’s you today, you have unwittingly celebrated today’s fun holiday – it’s Dress Up Your Pet Day.

I’m not ashamed to admit it – for most of my life I would have scoffed at this holiday, so if you’re rolling your eyes, it’s ok. I have had Siberian Huskies all my adult life, and they’re a breed that needs no bundling up in cold weather. Mother Nature literally designed them to be comfy in arctic conditions. I’ve never bought a coat or sweater for my dogs, and the only time any of them have worn booties is when they were loaned to a friend to run on his sled dog team for the winter. So no, I’m not someone who dresses up her dogs, except maybe at Halloween for a quick photo op.

That is, until I got my current Siberian, Kacey. It was...

Last week a dear friend asked me a question, and I’m going to ask you the same one: do you make New Year’s resolutions?

My answer is no. I’ve been on this planet long enough to have experienced my pattern of good intentions and so-so results when trying to make life changes in the middle of winter, my least-favorite season. What’s your answer?

No matter which side you’re on, Team Resolution or Team Go With the Flow, you’re in good company. About half of Americans make resolutions at the changing of the year, and the rest of us don’t. For those who do, only about 10% will succeed at their stated goal, and the other 90% will tap out this week or next.

Yes, most people who make resolutions give themselves two weeks or less before throwing in the towel. Turns out, the idea of change is much more fun than the reality of instituting that change. When you understand how habits form and are reinforced inside your brain’s architecture, this...

Oh, we human beings cherish endings and beginnings. From baby showers to funerals, housewarmings to homecomings, and of course to the hoopla around the changing of the year, the celebrations for the milestones in our lives show us just how important these events are.

But why?

Many of the traditions around endings and beginnings have been in place for hundreds of years, maybe even thousands of years, and in some cases far more than thousands of years. Around 100,000 years ago humans started intentionally burying their dead. In the century or so BCE, the Romans started celebrating birthdays, though usually only men’s birthdays and then only the big milestones, like 50 and 60 years. In the Renaissance period, families with wealth and nobility began celebrating birthdays amongst themselves. The concept of children’s birthday parties developed in Germany in the 1800’s and the brave new world of consumer products had a fresh itch to scratch. The origins of...

Oh, the lovely traditions of the holidays. For some, this time of year is all about festive traditions, and for some, it’s more about their religious affiliation. No matter what or why you celebrate, not every aspect of your holidays is made of wildflowers and unicorns. For a lot of people, there are parts of the festivities they wish would go away.

And that’s perfectly OK!

Maybe your family didn’t spring from a Norman Rockwell painting. Maybe your idyllic childhood was marred by a tragic loss. Maybe you have one dysfunctional person you can avoid the rest of the year but have to deal with during the holidays, and you’d really rather not.

It can be very difficult to buck traditions and family expectations, and it’s often the pathway to your own mental balance and wellbeing. I’m going to ask you an important question – are you an adult? If you’re living an otherwise autonomous life yet are having difficulty setting a holiday-related...

Think back to your childhood, and what you remember from Decembers past. Chances are, at least a few of your memories include sweets. Maybe your mom was like mine, and she made holiday cookies, candies, and pies. What did she make, and what was your favorite? Do you make it now, and if so, how do your family members react?

Maybe your December memories include some not-so-sweet ones. I remember watching Mom cry so hard I thought her heart would stop when Dad left for Viet Nam in December of 1968. I hope when you think back on your Decembers, the good memories drown out the not-so-good ones.

My mom was Eileen Weaver and she loved to create holiday favorites. Each year she’d spend pieces of several days creating a mountain of sugary goodness for the family and to give as gifts. Dad loved her peanut patties and date nut roll. My brothers and I loved her snowball cookies, and loved helping her make cut-out cookies decorated with colored icing and sprinkles. She made caramel corn,...

If there’s a high-water mark for brains, Alfred Nobel probably etched it. In his last will, signed in Paris on November 27^th, 1895, he left the bulk of his fortune to a special prize fund. He passed away just over a year later, and his legacy lives on today with the awarding of this year’s Nobel Prizes.

Nobel wanted the money he’d made in his varied and successful life to be invested well, and each year the organization he created would award monetary prizes. The categories he specified are those he was most interested in during his own life: physics, chemistry, physiology or medicine, literature, and peace. The awards would go to “those who, during the preceding year, shall have conferred the greatest benefit to humankind.”

Which brings us to we mere mortals – what is our benefit to humankind? It’s common for people to wonder what their purpose in this life is, and to wonder if they’re doing enough to “earn their keep” in...

Are you stuffed full of holidays like I am? In the span of six days, we’ve celebrated Thanksgiving, Black Friday, Cyber Monday and now Giving Tuesday. It’s been an expensive, exhausting six days for a lot of people!

As the calendar rolls around to the end of another year, this time between Thanksgiving and New Year’s Eve is filled with to-do’s – those you need to do, plus those that others need or want you to do. Especially when it comes to family gatherings, we put a lot of heavy expectations on ourselves. And the music doesn’t help, with holiday songs proclaiming that it’s the most wonderful time of the year, describing idyllic snow scenes, fireplaces, and true love, and of course we can’t forget the poignant longing in songs talking about missing loved ones at the holidays.

I’m not here to remind you of the extra stress you carry this time of year. Nope, as with every issue, this newsletter contains helpful information...

Day after tomorrow is Thanksgiving, traditionally the eating-est holiday in America. Attendance at family gatherings is expected, and woe be unto the newly married couple with parents, step-parents, grandparents and step-grandparents who all expect them to show up hungry to multiple, separate, family feasts. 

Thanksgiving is an emotional stick of dynamite. Wait – maybe “roller coaster” is the better analogy, because at least there are high spots to go with the predictable blow-ups. What could go wrong when people who are related to each other and who maybe don’t see each other all that often gather to share a meal?  

The host and family have been cleaning and cooking for days and are exhausted 

The guests arrive, most bringing what they were asked to bring and a few bringing what they wanted to bring, whether or not it was needed or wanted 

This cousin gets on the nerves of that cousin and loud spats ensue 

This uncle and...

Maybe the Grinch had something to do with it. Or maybe it was the late Joan Rivers, a comedienne famous for her “Can we talk” question as she launched into pointed, comical griping about someone who was annoying her.

November 19^th – today – is Have a Bad Day Day. And the Voice of Wagaliciousness, the person who helps you keep your emotional balance while the world around you wobbles out of control, wants you to celebrate this with gusto.

I do want you to be prepared, in case someone tells you to have a bad day today. Please don’t punch them!

There’s a very positive reason for this negative-sounding holiday: we can’t all “have a nice day” every day. As a matter of fact, much as we’d like to, most of us don’t even string together an entire 24 hours without at least a little bit of badness in it. It’s a lovely goal to “have a nice day” every day, and the tools and coping skills that help you “have...

Are you a veteran? Thank you! Are you the parent or sibling or child or spouse/partner of a veteran? Thank you! And yes, Veterans Day was yesterday – there are not enough ways to thank those who choose to serve in ways that most of us wouldn’t. Veterans are vital to the survival of our country – thank you to everyone who serves and has served.

And then there’s this weird, confusing piece:

Veterans Day is often treated as a very somber occasion, and I’ve never really figured that one out. On Memorial Day, a day set aside to remember Americans who died in battle, we have cookouts and fireworks. On Veterans Day, a day set aside to thank those who fought on behalf of our nation and returned home, there is a solemn wreath-laying ceremony at Arlington Cemetery’s Tomb of the Unknowns, a monument to military men and women who died in battle and whose remains were not recovered.

I’m pretty sure we have the observances flipped,...