Does this ever happen to you – a friend or relative calls, you see the call, and you choose to let them go to voicemail? It doesn’t matter why – in that moment that wasn’t a call you wanted to take or could take? Then you feel a little guilty and when you call them back later, you feel the need to explain yourself?

It’s common to assume that the other person is irritated that you didn’t answer, and once your brain gives you that premise, it’s a very human trait that you go to MSU – making stuff up about how your friend or relative feels about landing in your voicemail instead of talking to you. And our brains are really creative – they can imagine all sorts of negativity and convince us that it’s real. It’s not, and you don’t need to explain yourself.

Really – before you call the person back, remind yourself that everyone has a life and you’re entitled to have a life, too. You’re not the slave of everyone, expected to do their bidding on their timetable. A simple, “sorry to have missed your call” will do nicely, no explanation necessary.

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