What's the Argument About...Really?

Are you someone who finds yourself in arguments more than a couple of times a week? Or maybe you live with or work with someone who likes to argue?

What’s the argument really about?

Arguments are almost never about what they seem to be about – it’s not whether or not the trash is staying in the kitchen too long or the pants are hanging on the hanger wrong or the copier paper trays were all left empty…again!

People who argue a lot do it because they want recognition and validation, and if they have to argue to get it, so be it.

In a supportive environment, that recognition and validation will happen naturally – that’s how great teams operate. In an environment that might be lacking empathy and understanding between team members, arguments are the natural outgrowth. People want to find a solution that will solve a problem, once and for all. In a supportive environment, they work together to solve it. Otherwise, they argue and nothing gets solved.

If you’re surrounded by arguments, examine the environment. Arguments are really about a lack of understanding, recognition, and validation. Fix that and the arguments will fade away.

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