When someone is talking about you behind your back and you get upset and start defending yourself and trying to get people to see things the way you see them, not the way that other person sees them, you add fuel to their fire.

Let me say that again – defending yourself against a gossip or someone who is trying to sabotage you only strengthens their position, not yours. That feels counter-intuitive, yet when you think of brain science and human nature, you’ll feel the truth of it.

The other person is saying bad things about you. The people who hear it may believe those things, especially if they can’t see a good reason for that person to be undermining you. Then you come along and defend yourself, trying to convince people to like and trust you, and suddenly they see someone with a reason to be undermining the gossip. As you defend yourself, you raise doubts in the people who hear your defense.

Being defensive is not a good look – ignore the gossip, go on with your fabulous life, and watch the gossip focus on someone else, because you’re no fun anymore.

PS...want more? Subscribe to the Mind, Body, Soul Sessions podcast, a weekly mental spa treatment for your total self! #success #leader #lawofattraction #personaldevelopment #mentalwellbeing